The first 45 minutes of “Friend Request”

This is a long synopsis of “Friend Request”.

Now, before I begin, I have a 9 month old daughter who doesn’t go to bed until 8.30, as well as a real life job that means I get up at 6am and don’t get in until 6pm, on top of all the other extra curricular activities that I get up to such as having sex, drinking, playing football, having sex and drinking.

So by the time I fire up the Netflix/NowTV/DVD player and settle down to watch a film, I’m already half asleep. So prepare yourself for some half reviews of films!

It was with great trepidation that Jade and I decided to watch “Friend Request”. After my terrible experience with the other “social media based horror”; the 80 minute YouTube buffer “Unfriended”, I wholly anticipated another shower of shit starring whiny, preppy American teens and their perfect lives being disrupted by a strange outsider, who then dies and haunts them through their social media accounts.

And boy oh boy “Friend Request” did not disappoint.

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Let’s begin with my original review…

This review first appeared on my Facebook timeline about 2 years ago. It has been extended with extra witticisms, cynicisms and linksysisms. A bit like a director’s cut!

I saw 50 Shades of Grey last night (I know, I know I’m a sellout, I used to be cool blah blah blah) but for those of you that haven’t seen it let me pass on this helpful review type synopsis.

There’s this guy¬†who looks like Emmet, from The Lego Movie, with a six pack. He’s a billionaire but it’s not clear how he amassed this money but judging by his big “Grey Tower” I think it was because he’s a master builder.

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